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Driving Home After My Last Prostate Exam

My Harvard-trained urologist

straight black hair yet to be peppered

whom I’ve been somewhat intimate with

for ten years now

enters the examination room

looks at the test results

types something into his computer

and says You’re good.

Unless you have a problem, we’re done.

But the shoe will drop . . . someday.

Yes, it will, he says, but not here.

And I’m a bit saddened

not because his words portend my shelf life

but because . . . strangely . . . I will miss him

and my annual visit

to this sad room

with its sad faces

and sad words.

Driving home after my last prostate exam

David Bowie, dead at 69,

sings This Is Not America on the radio.

Head bandaged

buttons for eyes

he lies on a rickety chipped hospital bed

in an empty room

in Lazarus, his last video.

When the cancer spread, he stopped treatment.

David Bowie, Lazarus (2016)